This gun's for hire...

Not so much dancing in the dark, as dining in the dark. In the ongoing run of tin-arse proportions, Anna and I recently won a table for four at the 'Dining in the Dark' evening to be held at one of Auckland's best restaurants Clooney - and selling on TradeMe for over $600. Our tickets arrived as the blindfolds we were due to wear for the dinner and we invited Tom & Rae to join us for what was an awesome night.

We arrived on the night in the midst on NZ celebrity - the usual Auckland exhibition of Shortland Street actors, designers, and newsreaders. Alas, our entrance was not as sought after, as the photographer decided to skip asking us to strike a pose (nor did we make it onto the Close Up feature - see chapter four). Picking up champagne on the way through to our table, we were quickly served up a canape of - raw tuna and cured salmon, topped with a wasabi foam and caviar. Suspicion that we had invited only invited Rae so that we could drink her wine and eat her seafood are unfair, though we took full advantage!

We were then briefed that the lights we about to go out and that we were to don our blindfolds. We were also told that we were to be served up five courses, each accompanied by a different wine - to be told what the dish was after we had finished.

Though we all picked that the first dish served up was seafood, it was Anna who first to pick it was scallops. But none of this picked the foie gras. Though Rae - who had a non-seafood dish - out did us all...claiming that she had a potato risotto, only to be told it was a pear souffle! All accompanied by a Riesling.

Second course was a bit easier, ravioli filled with goats cheese. Though none of us picked the anchovy butter sauce - especially Rae, who supposedly doesn't like seafood. We certainly didn't pick the wine - a Pinot Noir...though as a white Pinot Noir, this wasn't surprising.

Next up was the most unusual dish of the night - it had us all stump. Beef was an early call, though I was putting my money on some kind of kidney or liver - which ended up being kind of close. Though I was well off with my dim sum dumpling call. It turned out to be lobster and veal sweetbreads! With artichoke, white asparagus and hazelnuts. The lobsters was obviously somewhat wasted on us, but it was a good way to introduced to sweetbreads. The easiest part of this course to pick was the wine - a Chardonnay.

Fourth course was pretty amazing. Anna showed off - picking early the venison on cauliflower puree, with cherries and cocoa flakes in a licorice sauce. Well, everything but the licorice. Served with a Pinot Noir - a normal one this time - this course was absolutely delicious.

The last course - a chocolate dish - was a bit easier to pick, especially with Tim Tams Classic Dark being a sponsor of the event. Though none of us picked that it was Sherry and not Port that accompanied it.

Our assumption that each dish would be presented in a form easy to eat blindfolded was very wrong, as each dish was set out on a plate and required deft use of both knife and fork. It was hard not to take a peak now and then to watch others chasing their food around the plate. Rae took nearly 5 minutes to stick it to one bit of asparagus. It also took a while to get used to conversation blind-folded, as you kind of projected your voice at a few decibels than what was probably required. Even going to the toilet required sticking your hand up to be led by the staff - though wisely blindfolds were removed once you got there.

The food overall was simply superb, and if we had paid $150 each to attend, I wouldn't have been disappointed. The experience of eating blind was also very cool. Interesting, rather than heightening the rest of your senses, they actually seemed subdued. I guess meaning that seeing your food is important to the overall taste you get from the food.

MaraSam a MaraSham

For the last 12 weeks I have been training towards the Auckland Marathon. It’s not my first (I ran the Edinburgh Marathon back in 2005, and of course there was a marathon at the end of the NZ Ironman last year), so I was specifically targeting to run a quick time – sub 3hr15mins (that's very quick for a short stocky guy).

Of course, this was done with my typically minimalist training plan – with only four training runs a week, and delaying the sacrifice of not drinking until only the week before the event. Training progressed well though, as I got more and more comfortable with running what is a pretty quick pace – 4min30sec K’s. Though signs were there that perhaps I was just a little too relaxed, when only three days (or what turned out to be four days) before the race, I found out that it was on the Sunday and not the Saturday!

Fortunate, as I wouldn’t have been happy getting up at 4am on two mornings in a row. A damn early start, necessary to get the ferry over to Devonport for the 6:10am start. The pre-race routine was disrupted by my inability to get rid of my previous night’s dinner – something that was to cause problems later on.

Nevertheless the race started in the early phases of dawn, with the first 15km rolling up and down the slopes of the North Shore. Things started well, I felt strong and was setting a good pace. Perhaps too good, as I was consistent running K splits under the required pace. But I felt good, so I wasn’t concerned at the time. Conditions were good for the run over the Harbour Bridge as I ran past Anna on the other side, who also thought I looked really good. Arriving at the half way mark, I had run a 1hr34min Half Marathon, still feeling really good and with plenty of time to spare.

However, it was from here that things started to go wrong. The next 10kms involved the run out to the turnaround point at St Helliers. It was over this 10kms that some of my splits just started to creep up and I felt I was losing my ability to manage this. Also, last night’s dinner was also beginning to make me a little uncomfortable. Perhaps I should have stopped earlier, but focusing on the time, I didn’t want a toilet break to cost me. Coming up to the turnaround, I knew something was seriously not right – both my energy and strength levels were plummeting – as I struggled to even keep my pace within 5min K’s and I was increasingly being overtaken by other runners. Even the usual secret weapon - flat Coke - wasn't helping. So this is what hitting the wall means!

The last 10km suddenly became less a run and more a shuffle – as 5min30sec K’s suddenly became the best I could manage. I worked out that going under 3hr15min was quickly disappearing, but was feeling powerless to do anything about it. In fact, I was feeling so bad, just finishing was looking like it was going to be challenge enough. It was also the realisation that I was probably not even going to beat my Edinburgh time of 3hr23mins that I finally took that toilet break with 5km to go – costing me three or four minutes but taking a weight of my shoulders (or more accurately, off my bowels).

A little lighter, but no happier, I slogged out the last 5km to a disappointing time of 3hr27mins. I know, I know – still a very good time, but when you are targeting a sub 3hr15min and your second half of the marathon is nearly half an hour slower than the first – it is somewhat disappointing. So here is me giving it the big thumbs down coming up to the finish.
My demise is pretty evident from the chart of my K split times.
The suddenness from which I went from feeling great to terrible is still what surprises me. Ultimately, I think the time I was targeting required a bit more commitment to training than I was prepared to give. I still had 3 or 4 kg on me than was ideal, and I probably should have been doing at least one more run each week. It wasn’t lost on me that all the runners going past me over the last 10km were a fair bit leaner than I am.

So that might be the end of my marathon career, I think I might just run half marathons from now on. Next up is the Lake Taupo Cycle Challenge in four weeks, followed by the Tauranga Half Ironman in January. And then I don’t have to feel bad about drinking and eating my way through the rest of summer…

The Night of Two Halves

This week we could have had two more different consecutive nights out.

On Thursday night we went to the opening night of the opera Eugene Onegin. The first time either us had ever been to an opera, which to be honest, was only because we won tickets through a competition in the Listener (which we subsequently found out were worth $150 each!). The opera is based upon the novel of the same name by the Russian author Alexander Pushkin. The follows the title character, a young aristocrat in the 1820s whose friend (Lensky) introduces him to the idealistic Tatyana, who subsequently pronounces her love for him. He rebukes her love and then soon after in a ball gets in a quarrel with his friend, with Lensky challenging Onegin to a foolish duel. The duel ends with Onegin killing his one and only friend. The last Act is several years later, when Onegin meets Tatyana again, who is now married to a Prince and has developed into a sophisticated Princess. Onegin realises he is now in love with the girl he rebuke long ago and pleads his love to Tatyana. Showing up Onegin's emotional and moral inferiority, the story finishes with Tatyana's rebuke of Onegin's love.

So how was three and a half hours of Opera? It was a lot of Opera! And we were certainly in the minority in the crowd under 50 (and I was the only person I saw wearing trainers). We did enjoy it, though trying to concentrate on the performances and read the sub-titles (it is in Russian) isn't easy. Some of the longer scenes were tiring, but the ball and duel scenes were fun. Not sure I will be rushing back to the next opera, but it was a good experience all the same.

Our Friday night couldn't be in greater contrast. We attended the charity event - Fight 2 Survive - which involved 14 colleagues from ANZ who were stepping into the boxing ring for the first (and probably last) time. The charity was Child Cancer, and these 14 brave souls had been receiving training for the past 3 months, though prior to that had no boxing experience. It was great fun - watching from ringside! The fights themselves were three 2-minute rounds, which you could tell was more than enough by the end. Each gave it their all, and it was fun watching them grapple between what they had been trained to do and their natural instincts to throw wild punches. But there was no holding back in the ring, a little bit of blood and one fight which was stopped early. The whole night was professionally run, Shane Cameron even turned up halfway through to say a few words. In all, $70,000 was raised, which is a pretty amazing feat. As someone who has never thrown a punch in their life, I could only respect what these guys had done.

UK/Europe Trip

The pics

Part Five – London’s Burning

We ‘only’ had a week in London, so we were going to make the most of it. This started as soon as we got into London on Friday night. Quickly dropping off our gear back in Putney, we meet up with Todd & Nic for dinner before heading out to meet some of the crew on the other side of town in Shoreditch. Somehow, after a few drinks at a pub, we found ourselves in cabs heading to a pub called the Birdcage. Sold to us as a real East London pub, it didn’t disappoint on that front. It was karaoke night and it was a big hit with the locals. I’m not sure we fitted in – conversation was pretty tough as I could hardly understand them – but they were certainly having a good time. The night carried on, as they do, and Anna, Kellie and I found ourselves coming home in a taxi at 6am in the morning!

Not surprisingly Saturday was a bit slow. We managed to pull ourselves out of bed eventually, as we were meeting at the pub to watch the All Blacks game. It was also meant to be a big night, but after the night before that was no longer on the cards, but we still manage to stay up until 11pm before crawling off to a much needed sleep.

Well rested (or at least better rested), we organised what we thought would be a lazy Sunday at another old favourite – The White Horse on Parsons Green. But again we had forgot what a Sunday Session in London can turn into. Lunch and drinks turns into lunch and lots of drinks, and we didn’t leave The White Horse until 10pm. Well, the others left, as I went to the toilet and found that everyone had left. I had to follow them back to Todd & Nic’s on my lonesome! Sensibly, being a Sunday of course, we decided to have a few more drinks at Todd & Nic’s, and didn’t end up leaving until 2am. That was OK for us, we didn’t have to go to work the next day. But we were woken up in the Monday by the first lot of hate texts we got that week…

We had talked up making the most of everyday we had before we left. But in the interests of lasting the week, we called a truce and let everyone have the night off. And it was the Great British Beer Festival the next night, and I wanted to make sure I was in form for that. It also meant that I could feel good enough to go for a few runs during the week, along the old stomping group of the Thames path.

To say that it was just by chance that the Great British Beer festival was on when we were in London would obviously be a big fat lie. I decided I wanted to go on the first night to make sure I had a good chance of getting to the ales I wanted. And the strategy didn’t disappoint, getting to try the Champion Beer of Britain – the Rudgate Ruby Mild – and it didn’t disappoint! Nor did “Britain’s Biggest Bratwurst. Jabs and I had gone in search of the sausages we saw people eating and were about to order the 9” Bratwursts when we saw them throw onto the grill these massive 20” Bratwursts. It was a challenge too good to refuse and we promptly changed our order. Si got a bit of a shock when we arrived back, and it probably took us a good half an hour to finish them. And being the healthy event that is a beer festival, we had already devoured a few bags of pork scratchings and pork pies. It was definitely our night. Earlier in the evening someone had given us a good of vouchers for free beers, and then just as we were thinking of earning, someone came over and gave us £20 worth of vouchers. Score!

After a bit of shopping on the Wednesday, it was one last trip to the Bricklayers Arms and a few Timothy Taylors. Jabs took me out for lunch in Soho on Thursday, and Thursday night we had organised for our final dinner at the Queen Adelaide. True to form, London put on a stunning last night for us, stunningly wet. It was a massive downpour all night, which acted as a lock in. We only left the pub by midnight, and sensibly again stop in at Todd & Nic’s on the way home. A 2am finish again, and again hate texts in the morning. But we knew everyone would miss us, just maybe not their livers…

Our livers were certainly looking forward to a holiday, though we were not looking forward to ours ending. Being in London again was awesome, and wandering around Putney (and even riding the tube) just felt like being home. It’s just so much fun!

Part Four – Oop North

Flying back late in Gatwick, we had one of those London experiences we had forgotten about. Making good time out of the plan and picking up our bags, we made it to the train platform 2.5 seconds after the doors of the train closed, only to then find out the next train isn’t for another half an hour. Oh joy.

Though the next day, we experienced the other side, as we caught the train up to Leeds to spend a few days with James & Petra. What would be a painful 4 hour drive in New Zealand is an easy 2 hour trip on the train. That evening we headed into Leeds to visit some cools pubs and have a traditional Yorkshire curry. The curry was good, but not as impressive as the naan, which were massive and served on the end of large hooks. And we only got the normal size - the “family size” was big enough to provide overhead shelter for a small scout group.

The next day the English summer finally caught up with us good and proper – it rained all day. Which put a bit of a damper on our excursion into the Yorkshire Dales. Nevermind, that just meant more pub time and less walking time. This included visiting James & Petra’s wedding venue – The Craven Arms pub, with a medieval barn attached to the rear. The pub also has its own local microbrewery, which is going to brew a special beer for the wedding. It’s enough to make me want to get married there!

The next day we drove up to the Lakes District – via some select pubs of course – to stay our final night with Petra’s parents, who live in an awesome renovated slate house at the end of the very remote Kentmere Valley. It is a classic Lake District valley – apparently it is the setting of Postman Pat – and was a real treat. And Petra’s parent’s place was no typical cottage, her old man is a technie-nerd. There were three TVs in the house, including the Den with its projector screen. We even had our own ensuite room about the garage – it was like staying in a B&B. Not only that, but Petra’s mum treated us to a three-course meal as we did a taste off of the wines James & Petra were trialing for the wedding (Kiwi Sav and Argentinean Red).

The weather improved for our final day up north. Enough for me to go for a run with James around the valley. Hard work for someone who has spent the last 3 weeks drinking and eating his way around the Czech Republic and Croatia. Especially as James is a serious runner, competing in National and European meetings and running 5kms in around 14min20secs. He took it easy on me.

It was an awesome few days catching up with James & Petra – and a shame we didn’t have more time.

Part Three - Becalmed in Croatia

Arriving a bit later than planned – we first had to make our way through the onerous Croatian customs. That was sarcastic by the way…kids we running back and through the custom desks and I don’t think the customs officer actually looked down at my passport. We then made our way to the marina Therapy was berthed at, just north of Dubrovnik.

Unfortunately, our first day was stuck in the marina as the winds were too strong. However, we set out the next day for a sail and to rendezvous with Si & Kellie later that night. However, departing the marina was full of drama. The marina was situated up a long river hemmed in by steep cliffs on both sides. Being in a river, manoeuvring the boat needs to take into account both the river flow as well as the wind. We were in a tight spot and it was tricky work getting ourselves out. It was squeezing out of our berth that we lost control of the boat momentarily and we knocked, of all things, the very expensive looking lacquered speedboat. And the speedboat belonging to the gin palace berthed next to it, which itself had Russian owners, absent at the time. Marty had to head back to purvey the damage with the staff (who had just been polishing the speedboat that morning), but it was so small to be of little consequence. But that didn’t stop us ribbing Marty that it had to be wary of Russian Mafia and concrete gumboots.

We eventually took off to anchor up in one of the many sheltered coves and for the first of many swim and lunches. That night we anchored outside Cavtat, a handy location to the Dubrovnik airport, to pick up Si & Kellie. The next day we headed up North, planning to island hop our way up to Korcula. Si & Kellie quickly made themselves at home – perhaps getting too comfortable. Their pasty white London skin wasn’t quite prepared and for the rest of the week Si wore a permanent white singlet.

Over the next week we had awesome weather. For a couple of hours one afternoon we saw some cloud, but apart from that it was only blue sky in all directions. The only downside was a distinct lack of wind. We got a decent sail a couple of times, but most of the time was spent under motor. But the anchoring spots made it all worth it. Horseshoe bays that were so calm it was sometimes difficult to remember you were on a boat. And crystal clear water, that perfect temperature to be both refreshing and comfortable. So we settled into the rhythm of swim-beer-swim-eat-beer-swim-beer. Si especially took to this and quickly claimed the title of “Sloth”.

Our turnaround point was Korcula – an awesome walled-town (on the island of Korcula) occupying the end of a peninsula. We wandered the tight streets one late afternoon and enjoyed some cocktails at a bar that sat up the top of a turret. There was a ladder to get to the top, and your drinks arrived by a pulley system.

We made our back with more of the same, spotting a couple of dolphins for a change of scene. As Si & Kellie’s last day arrived we had to head into the Dubrovnik marina again, as the non-existent winds turned in a strong gale – a weird symmetry with the start of the week. This was Si & Kellie’s first visit to a marina, as we had anchored every night they had been on the boat. We all headed into Dubrovnik before Si & Kellie’s flight, for a couple of last beers sitting at the bars on the rocks outside Dubrovnik’s walls. For Anna and I, the next day was our last as well. Just enough time to head out for one last swim-eat-beer before catching out flight back to London.

Being on a boat in Croatia was a much different experience to Southern France. The lack of sailing weather is noticeable, but this is more than offset by the awesome anchoring spots that make marinas hardly necessary. It was a very relaxing 10 days – something we probably needed after our last week in London rather than before. But more of that to come…

Part Two – Czech’ing it out

Though we flew into Prague Airport, that was as close as we got, as we had already been to Prague many years ago. This trip was about touring a bit of the Czech countryside and, surprise surprise, visit some fine Czech Breweries with the Good Beer Guide: Czech Republic in hand.

It was certainly an interesting trip. Straight away it was clear it was a strange country, where you are offered a choice between a Mercedes-Benz and a Ford Focus as your rental car – pretty easy choice that! And the roads themselves were very interesting. There seems to two trucks to every car on the road, the result being that the roads themselves are in pretty bad shape. The right-hand lanes of the motorways seem to be one endless series of potholes.

The Czech drivers themselves seem to be of two breeds. One breed seems to be perfectly comfortable driving 60km in a 90km zone. The other seems so concerned to check that their steering is working, they have to change lanes or overtake every 2 seconds, and seem intent on reading the maker’s name on the screws that are holding your license plate to the bumper!

But out in the countryside it is very scenic, with bright green rolling hills studded by attractive little towns (that’s where there isn’t some hulk of a Communist concrete block towering above them). The Czech countryside reminded me of how intensive livestock farming and forestry have ruined much of NZ’s countryside. The Czech people seem to take advantage of this as well – with plenty of hikers and cyclists about. Though this is in sharp contract with the rest of their lifestyle – which involves a lot of smoking (especially in pubs and restaurants, which is difficult getting used to again) and not what you would call the healthiest of cuisine’s. Stodge, stodge and more stodge. I love a dumpling as much as the next man, but after 5 days of them it was admittedly getting a bit tough. Not that it seems to be slowing down reproduction, there seemed to be newborn babies everywhere.

And there is also lots of water. Every town seems to have to have a pond or lake of some description – most of them dammed. You wouldn’t swim in them though. Perhaps they are used to farm Carp, which is on the menu everywhere, but has to be the top nomination for the most flavourless fish around.

So our first destination was Telc in South Moravia – a beautiful Renaissance town that was probably the pick of our trip. We had a room overlooking the town square and I got my first taste of some good Czech beer (Bernard) – though what stunned me more than anything was the price, about $1.80 for a pint!

The next day we criss-crossed our way across southern Czech Republic, arriving at Ceske Budejovice for lunch and the famous Budejovicky Budvar – famous for being the original “Budweiser”. I was able to sample two of their beers that are not as commonly available – the krouzkovany lezak (which is “yeast beer”, where a dose of young beer – fresh yeast and wort – is added after lagering), and the svetle vycepni (which is a lighter version of their Premium beer).

After lunch we drove through South Bohemia up to our destination of Plzen (we skipped the awesome Ceske Krumlov, as once again we visited it on a previous trip), stopping by at a couple of breweries, and though their beers were OK, not worth a special mention. Plzen itself is nice enough (it is a big student city), but the main reason it was our destination was because it is home to Pilsner Urquell Brewery, and also the opportunity to taste their amazing kvasnicovy (yeast beer again). The citrus sweetness combined with the yeasty dryness to make it very moreish.

After walking around the grounds of Pilsner Urquell Brewery the next morning, we made our way out to the small town of Dobrany just outside Plzen to lunch at the Modra Hvezda brewpub. This was a real find, as we sat outside in the sunshine and enjoyed one of our better meals on our trip. They had a range of four different beers on tap, and I couldn’t find too many faults with any of them, the tmavy (dark lager) and a stronger bock particularly good. Anna also had her first taste of what we saw a lot of people drinking – Birell, a 0% alcohol beer. The Czech Republic is a zero alcohol level for driving, and these Czechs enjoy their beer so much (they have the highest beer consumption per person in the world), they knock back this 0% beer in large amounts. I guess is was OK for what it was – but I was happy that Anna was doing the driving...

From Dobrany we were just making the relatively short trip to Chodova to the brewery/hotel/restaurant/spa, where we were both staying and taking in a massage and beer bath. Yes, that’s right, a beer bath! In a warm, brick-lined cellar, a steel tub-for-two was filled with a 50:50 mix of mineral water and a specially brewed low-alcohol bathing beer, at a temperature of 34 degrees. Admittedly it was a bit weird. The water was pretty murky and full of little bits, which I am assuming is some of the mash. But it was hard not to enjoy when you just sit back and get passed glasses of a light Chodovar lager. But then things got weirder…

After 30 minutes we were ushered out of the bath – the woman didn’t seem fussed that we were naked – and led to another even warmer room where we were swaddled with blankets and told to lie down on a chaise-lounge. It didn’t take long to get a big sweat on – and I guess that is the point, a bit like a poor man’s sauna – in the midst of the sweet malt and spicy hop aroma rising from your skin. It was difficult to decide whether to relax or laugh.

After that experience, later that night we ate at the Chodovar restaurant, which is set within lagering caves from the 12th century. While the setting was cool, our fellow diners were not. It seemed that a couple of busloads of pushy German tourists had also turned up without reservations and intent on squeezing in on our table. Even Anna’s evil-eye didn’t seem to work on them.

The next day we drove around the northwest Bohemia, famous for its spa towns. They are bizarre affairs, very opulent, but now also very touristy. The towns were made popular because of their mineral waters, which people were prescribed for various ailments. Now it seems tourists buy the ridiculous porcelain mugs things and drink the sulphury tasting water, the irony of also smoking a cigarette lost on many of them. We could only take so much of these spa towns, so decided to pop over the border into Germany for lunch – Bavaria no less, so it would have definitely been rude not to – and found the very nice town of Waldsassen. I relief at eating a meal not involving goulash or dumplings could probably be heard back in the Czech Republic as we enjoyed schnitzel (of course) and venison, as well as a couple of local brews, including a delicious Hefeweizen.

Back across the border and we only had a short trip to Loket – where we would be spending our last night. This fairy-tale town, perched on a mountain ridge with a river that serpentines it way around it on three sides, is also known for featuring in Casino Royale. We stayed at the brewpub/hotel, where their one beer was one of the best of the trip.

Our last day brought something new on this trip – rain. Until then, we had had beautifully warm and sunny days. Driving back towards the airport and with time to peruse the Good Beer Guide, I found one last brewpub that I wanted to visit – and it was only 15 minutes from the airport. And what a great call that was, as it had the best beers of the trip. The Chyne beers were absolutely stunning, my favourite was their cerny (dark lager), but the potomavy (half-dark) and svetle (light) were equally good. It was with much regret that I had to pull myself away – and even more so when we got to the airport, only to discover that our flight had been delayed for three hours.

It was a very enjoyable 5 days in the Czech Republic. There might not have been the wow factor, but a very enjoyable place to travel around. It was only the cuisine that we tired of; you can only take so much stodge – even me. And on the beer front there were some real finds. Though not typically beer styles I warm to, when they are brewed with such skill as were on offer here, it is hard not to be impressed by the bittersweet qualities of the variety of Czech lagers. A fine education for a Yeastie Boy.

Part One – London’s Calling

Woohoo, a month away. Surely the best way to use a year’s worth of annual leave. Though of course it starts with the dreaded long haul all the way to Heathrow. And on the first leg it seemed it was going so well.

We were on one of the new Air NZ planes to San Francisco. They definitely have more legroom, and the seats seem that little bit wider. And in what seemed like a full flight, we also seemed be fortunate enough to have the one spare seat next to us. Of course, we should have known that this would balance out somewhere else…

We had a four-hour stop over in San Francisco. Not enough time to head into the city, but just enough to track down the Anchor Brewery Bar and have their very good brews. So despite getting no sleep on the first leg, I was feeling good about the second leg to London. That was until we boarded our Virgin Atlantic flight. It had the old style seats, which we had forgotten how little they “recline”, staffed by what seemed a select sample of the Chav population out of Essex. And then…my personal entertainment system didn’t work. And with the flight completely full, I couldn’t move anywhere else, and the staff didn’t seemed to care anyway. So I had to go the whole sleepless 12 hours to London with nothing to do.

Of course, at least I had the treats of London awaiting us. Deb meet us at the airport and from there it was back onto the tube (with my old Oyster card which still had money on it!) and into Putney. After a couple of groggy showers, down we headed to The Bricklayers Arms to meet up with all the crew. The Bricklayers was still as good as I remembered it, all the Timothy Taylors range, plus a couple of additional handpulls they have installed for more guests. But I only had eyes for the Dark Mild – and it wasn’t disappointing.

It only took a few pints to throw off the grogginess and it was like old times again in London. Later on we wandered down the road to another old haunt – Putney Tandoori – where I was greeted like a long lost son (though the stroking of my hair seemed a little weird!). Somehow Anna and I found ourselves back at Todd & Nic’s, going strong until 1.30am when we finally thought we should try and get some sleep (I had gone some 60 hours without any by then) – and sleep we did.

Sunday was meant to be a lazy afternoon up at The Telegraph – a pub up in Putney Heath that had been the talk of the town ever since I left. It calls itself a “country pub in London”, and that is a pretty accurate description. I’m not sure how it happened, but next thing I know it is 11pm and I am only just leaving the Coat and Badge after an all day Sunday session. Not a bad start of the holiday!

We only had one more day before we flew out to the Czech Republic, so we dragged everyone out again for a drink after work before Anna and I went out to dinner with Deb and Carl to Gordon Ramsey’s Murano. For those of you who know (or care) about these things, Murano is headed by Gordon Ramsey’s protégé Angela Hartnett. I think this is the third time we have eaten at a Gordon Ramsey restaurant, and it didn’t disappoint, either the palate or the wallet. At £215, it’s not cheap, especially in NZ dollars, where it converts to $lots!

It had been a great first weekend in London to kick the holiday off – though didn’t help to shrug off the affects of jetlag – and it was great catching up with everyone. Next stop, the Pilsners of the Czech Republic…

Taupombledon 2009

The competitive spirit was warmed up for the second time this (in)famous tournament was to be played on NZ shores with the great linguistic Taupombledon vs Taupimbledon debate. The o's won it, for no more reason than it rolls off the tongue better...and it's printed on the scoreboard.

Friday was accompanied by the usual bemoaning of the Wellingtonians about the drive up - you all choose to live in that hemmed in backwater ;-)

But normal order was quickly restored once the keg was tapped and the beer was flowing. A nice little surprise for the Friday night - a half keg of Kid Chocolate left over from the Auckland beer festival. The traditional bacon sarnie fry-up was held sometime after midnight, and the last of us trickled off to bed at - a probably unwise - sometime after 3am.

Despite the forecast for some showers from the summerless south, Taupo managed to put on another perfect day for tennis - not too hot, not too cold. A new element to the tournament was unveiled, creche corner - where more athletic ability was probably displayed than on court. Of course, the tennis once again took a back seat to the real purpose of the day - the drinking - a keg of Emersons Pilsner for the boys (perhaps a little too hoppy to accompany a day of tennis), and punch for the girls (minus 2).

But there has to be a winner on the day - and this year, finally, Rae & Tom managed to pick up the title to their own tournament. I think they were quietly chuffed, and there might have even been some subtle fist-pumping at the back of the court. Of course, the final game of tennis does no mean a halt to proceedings, as the trophy quickly becomes the object of attention with a game of "tennis-ball-soccer-header". This may go down as one of the best games ever, extending to a marathon 7 sets.

Post the BBQ dinner, the night finished much earlier this year - perhaps the influence of the kiddies, perhaps the extra strength in the Pilsner, perhaps we are all just getting older...

But still another great Taupombledon weekend.

City Chasing

On Saturday Tom and I took part in the inaugural ANZ City Chase. It drew more than 300 teams into an adventure which ranged from the North Shore's Devonport to the eastern waterfront's Okahu Bay.

The event was the first in New Zealand and the 300 teams made it the largest first time event per capita for any country that has a City Chase event. The winning team completed ten of the twenty chase points in 2hrs 9mins - a fair bit faster than Tom and I. But we were just in it for fun, and we had plenty of that.

Teams must travel only by foot or approved local public transport - bus, ferry or train, and stay within 25m of each other at all times. Any other methods of transportation, including any form of private transportation, bicycle, car, taxi, motorcycle, rollerblades, hang glider, magic carpet, camel and rickshaw were strictly prohibited

Tom and I finished down the pack in what was still a respectable 3hrs 40mins, well inside the deadline of 6 hours. Our biggest hindrance time-wise was heading over to Devonport to claim the chased points there - all of the top teams stayed on the southern side of the harbour. However, as a result they missed out on the best task of the day.

The Chase started off down at the Viaduct with an impromptu task. You couldn't get your Clue Sheet until you brought back two of - an ATM receipt, some foreign currency, or a coin from 1993. This set off a mad dash by all competitors, with every tourist (or anyone who looked like a tourist) hassled for change. This too longer than you think - even more frustrating that I had been to an ATM just 20 minutes earlier - but of course, no receipt.

Finally, with Clue Sheet in hand, Tom and I thought the best plan of attack would be head across to Devonport, where 5 of the tasks were located very close together. We weren't the only ones, as the first ferry was crowded by other teams with the same thought. Though the short trip gave us an opportunity to strategise - and also call Anna to google some of the clues.

Our first chase point proved simple enough. At Devonport Chocolates, we simply had to wrap a couple of chocolates to their approval - and we got to keep the chocolates.

Close by was our second task, which was to paint each other's faces to match the pictures. We choose what look to be easiest - the Dalmatian. Mistake was to let Tom go first, he was trying to make my face perfect and absolutely caked my face with paint. After looking at what some of the other efforts were given approval, I realised all I need to was randomly put some white and black paint on Tom's face and it would be fine.

Caked in paint, we headed off to the next stop, which was the "special ANZ Chase menu". This proved to be rolling a dice and having to eat a grub or insect. They were quite small so ended up pretty easy, the worst seemed to be the crickets and fortunately neither of us rolled those.

We now had a bit of a march to North Head where a queue had built up waiting for buckets. Fortunately I had a VIP pass, which enabled us to jump the queue - go to be some benefits working for the sponsor! We had to carry two buckets of water from the beach to the top of the Head and then complete a mental task with the water. I had seen it before, so it proved quite easy. However, the combination of all this running and and the sun meant we had quite a sweat on - not that great when you have a paint face!

We not just had one last task in Devonport - and this was the best of the day. We had to head in the Naval Base, where we had to done overalls and life jacket - all to the orders of a young drill sergeant. We then boarded the frigate Te Mana and had to leap from the side into the harbour, and the scale the ladder up the side back onto the frigate. It was absolutely awesome and if I had thought about it then, I would have done it again. It's not every day you get to jump off the side of a naval frigate.

With 5 Chase Points down, we were pretty chuffed with ourselves, and even had enough time for a pie and a coke before the ferry left to go back into the city (what we didn't know was that the winning team was finishing as we were chowing down!).

Back in the city, a short sprint to Britomart, where we soon found ourselves trying to find a stranger to sing Split Enz's I See Red with us.

It was then a short wait to take us up to Parnell, where we had to find a park to answer some questions about the ANZ Netball Championship and then shoot some hoops.

We then thought we were making our way across to the Parnell Rose Gardens, which we thought were an answer to another clue. However, on arriving we quickly realised we got that one wrong and there was no one else in sight! Fortunately, this was en route to the Parnell Baths anyway, which was definitely a correct answer. This involved swimming a length of the Parnell baths herding blow up sheep. A little unusual, but Tom and I aced this, even having to wait for a couple of young guys who we caught up, who couldn't control their sheep.

We were on the home straight now and only had two last Chase Points to collect, with plenty of options Downtown.

At the Ice Bar, there was the simple task of bobbing for of ice cubes. Though a little surreal with some tourists drinking cocktails out of ice glasses next to you (though why they are in the Ice Bar in the middle of the day, I do not know?).

Our tenth and last Chase Point was then just across in the Maritime Museum, which we had to scour for answers to a question sheet. Then it was a sprint (more a half-walk/half-jog by that stage) of about 200 metres to the finish at O'Hagans pub - and a much welcomed beer.

It was an awesome event and I cannot recommend it more highly for anyone who wants something fun to do next year.

Kai Iwi Lakes (Northland)

Photos here

Ever since Brad & Shaz mentioned stumbling upon this awesome lakes when they tripped around Northland last year, I've been wanting make my way up to the Kai Iwi Lakes. With a long weekend on offer because of Waitangi Day, Anna and I headed up with Rae & Tom to check them out.

Resisting Rae & Tom's urge to leave before the sun came up "to beat traffic", we left at a reasonable hour and got up there in less than 3 hours. We first travelled along the new Northern Gateway Tollroad, which has received a fair bit of press since it opened. What a load of kerfuffle though. It is brilliant - cutting off at least 15 minutes (and probably more on long weekends such as this) with the bypassing of Orewa - though I wonder if the Dairies and Service Stations of Orewa are so thrilled by it. And for those idiots who complain about the queues to pay by the cash toll booths (though there weren't any when we went through) - you should try making it to the 21st century and pay by internet, it's so damn easy.

Skipping the thrills and sights of the infamous Kauri Museum (Anna and I are still scarred by the experience of having to follow Julie many years ago as she inspected every bit of timber and Kauri gum - and trust me, there is a lot of it), it was just a brief stop at Dargaville (and you don't want it to be any longer than 'brief') and we dropped off our stuff at the bach we had hired at Omariri Beach, just 10 minutes from the lakes. It didn't take us long to get to the lakes from there, and it didn't take us long to be wowed by the lakes themselves.

The Kai Iwi Lakes are lakes that have been formed by rainwater in depressions of sand dunes. This combines to make what is for me the best swimming spot I have ever been to in New Zealand. The lake is crystal clear and surround by soft sand, and the main swimming beach is just superb. It has a shelf that is waist deep which stretches out for 50 metres before suddenly dropping away steeply. The shelf is perfect for mucking around - and especially for throwing and catching a tennis ball (which Tom and I engaged in for hours). A group of guys had also erected scaffolding (not OSH approved that's for sure) right on the edge of the shelf with about a 5 metre jump into the deep. And if you got bored of that, you could simply go for a proper swim off the shelf.

The strange thing - to me anyway - was that the lake wasn't busier. Sure, there were plenty of people there - but I was surprised it wasn't packed. And it seemed that most people there seemed to be tourists (and mostly English tourists at that) - the lakes obviously must be on the Lonely Planet trail. Now that I know they are there, I will be definitely planning return trips whenever there is weather that is as good as we had that weekend (it was hot and we hardly saw a cloud in the sky the whole time).

So three days up north, and three days spent at the lakes. Though in the Saturday we did go for a drive further north to Hokianga Harbour, stopping in to check out Tane Mahuta - which Rae hadn't seen before. All in all, a great long weekend away. We arrived back on Sunday afternoon to an Auckland that was still baking, so had to head to the beach straight away. However, this has been followed by a week of weather as humid as I can remember - including the hottest temperature recorded in Auckland for over 100 years, and sticky nights where the low one night was recorded at 22.1 degrees (not comfortable). If only I could pop down to the lakes...

Downhilling it at Tongariro

It was Auckland Anniversary weekend and we headed down to National Park for some mountain biking with the pub quiz crew from Auckland. Heading down there on the Saturday morning, the weather couldn't have been much better.

That afternoon we road down the Fishers Track - which starts just out the back of National Park. It is 20-odd km of mostly downhill, some of it dirt and some of it grass. The first part took is through chutes of Toi Tois before having to navigate quite a tricky slippery mud and rock path. This then opened out into mostly grassy paths that were heaps of fun. The most amazing part of the track was that it appeared to be in the middle of nowhere, with awesome views over native bush. The track itself involves a 500m descent, but fortunately you are not required to ascend back up (though you could if you wanted and were crazy enough). The alternative (and very wise it is too) is to book the pick-up bus to meet you at the end and take you back up to National Park where a much needed beer awaits.

The next day we got up early to ride the 42 Traverse. This again is a mostly downhill ride of around 45kms, though with a couple of descent climbs. This time you get dropped off at the start by the bus and again get returned from the bottom. Most of the trail is a mix of fire breaks and track and again surrounded by nothing but native bush. The downhills are long and pretty quick, and your hands and feet are pretty sore by the time you get to the bottom of them. There are also some stream crossings at the bottom of the descents - where admittedly Anna showed me how it is meant to be done (though, in my defense, I got some bad advise beforehand).

But it wasn't all fun and games. With no clouds in the sky and little wind, the climbs back up were a good workout. But at least this gave me the chance to get one back on the more experienced mountain bikers, as I left them behind churning up the hills - they left me behind on the downhills, so had to get them back somewhere. It was still damn hard work though, and at the top of the two hills we all needed well earned breaks and to cool down from boiling point. The reward at the end is a dip in a swimming hole - freezing cold melt water from Ruapahu just what the legs need after a good ride. The bus arrives just at the right time, this time with beers on board - you beaut!

And all this is done with enough time to drive back to Auckland that night. A damn fun and easy weekend away, we'll be doing it again. Especially now that Anna has since ditched the hire bikes and bought herself a shiny new MTB.

Some picks from the two days here.

A Day at the Tennis

Courtesy of the shareholders and customers of a certain bank, I spent the day court side at the finals of the NZ Heineken Open. The tennis was good, the beer was pretty bad.

The men's single final involved top seed and number 9 in the world - Argentine Juan Martin Del Potro - versus namesake American Sam Querrey. With Del Potro playing, this gave me the chance to dust off my faux Puma's top and go a bit latino.

As you can see, the view from the corporate box wasn't too bad - though with the sun out it got pretty hot. What to do...give the wave and order more drinks. Though things didn't go so smoothly around lunch time. Having just been served our lunch towards the end of the 1st Set, a first serve fault very nearly rebounded straight into my crispy pork belly. Before I knew what had happened, a work colleague behind me tossed the offending ball back onto court. Problem was, the second serve had just been sent down. This didn't do much to endear us to Mr Del Potro, who was at the receiving end at the time. Mutterings of Spanish were quickly sent in our direction - probably just as well that they appeared to be outside my five and a half word Spanish vocabulary. Fortunately my pork belly wasn't threatened any further in the match, and Del Potro won comfortably in two sets, 6-4 6-4.

Once the tennis was finished, we retired to the 'Base Line After Party', which included a pretty awesome set from Liam Finn, and a whole lot of terrible middle-aged dancing.

Mike & Iris - wedded at last

You know the story

Boy meets girl...
Boy and girl play boyfriend-girlfriend for 15 years...
Boy and girl get married...
Boy and girl foolishly leave drunk friend with camera at wedding reception...